Ever notice that most comics are more often thought provoking than funny? In today’s comic section there’s a panel that shows a marriage counselor sitting before a newlywed couple named Cyndi and Handsome who recently had a storybook wedding. The counselor says, “‘Happily Ever After’ can lead to some pretty unrealistic expectations. Let’s work on that.”
Unrealistic expectations can never be met, which can leave one feeling frustrated and angry; thus, opening the door to your drug of choice. I once heard, “Satan wants us to believe meaningless things for meaningless reasons.” He loves to plant meaningless thoughts (Jn. 8:44) into our heads that lead us to living meaningless lives, which only further fuels our frustration and anger.
Some of these unrealistic expectations and meaningless thoughts can only be discovered when we either get angry or take our drug of choice. Instead of beating ourselves up for getting angry or falling, how about putting that beat-me stick down and asking the Spirit, “What expectations and/or thoughts led to that angry outburst or drug of choice?” Once He does, and He will as this is His job (Jn. 16:13), we need to ask Him to help us filter those thoughts through the truths and biblical expectations found in Scripture. Now we can find freedom and experience peace by exercising the truth.
The FREEdom Process means being vulnerable to either the Spirit and/or another believer (James 5:16). Are you ready? Asked another way, what would you do if you really believed that God wanted to beat your addictions? To make your marriage great? To give your life meaning? Freedom has been paid for, but it doesn’t come without a cost.
Set “Free” Nowww
More Than A Sunday Faith
GREAT thought provoking piece! Have you noticed that the frustrations and anger can be a result of the process itself? Between realizing that you have believed and held onto an unrealistic expectation/unreasonable thought process, recognizing the consequences of that expectation/unreasonable thought process, obtaining the appropriate tools to correct it, practicing using those tools consistently and allowing the Holy Spirit to help you through this season AND the speed of how the execution of the whole process and season will create various emotions. The emotions, the process, the transformation and the acceptance of this transformation of the people directly and indirectly subject to your evolution can be a price not all are willing to pay. After all – the individual, people around them and his/her environment have bought into and have held onto that unrealistic expectation/unreasonable thought process for how ever long it took you and them to realize, recognize and the execution of the solution. After all that is why ALL things are working together to the Glory of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose!
In accordance and in agreeing with this article; not all will be sensitive or open to realizing, recognizing and executing a solution to an unrealistic expectation or an unreasonable thought process from either the Holy Spirit or a fellow believer. Therefore the preparation will take longer, the process will take longer and the transformation will be delayed as a direct result of the process just mentioned. If believers actually BELIEVED God’s words, the process and execution of the process; EVERYTHING would be very different.
Thanks for the comment. I really appreciate your honesty. I totally agree with you that the process God set up to change our lives takes time, which can cause added frustration. This is especially true in our western society where we want our problems or those who are causing us problems solved…yesterday. Yet, this very thought is another unrealistic expectation. God can go the miracle and change our lives in an instant, but what if He chooses not to like He did in Paul’s case (2 Cor. 12:7-10)? Will we stay relaxed in the truth that He is the Author and Completer of my faith? Will we continue to apply the NOWWW principles, which are just as important as the FREEdom principles and give ourselves time and room to be changed and actually experience His peace? We can choose to let this added frustration be the basis for using the “beat-me” stick on ourselves or stop using our filter and remain the same or we can use it as the basis for failing forward. This is much easier said that done, but true nonetheless. I sure wish He would do the miracle in my life. At the moment, through His great love for me, He hasn’t chosen to do so.
This entire life-change process would be much easier if everyone in our lives was on board with it or better yet actually going through it with us. Again, the real world tells us that this will not be the case. Not everyone will want to take this journey with us, which is a sad commentary on the Church. If you think about it though, isn’t this simply the result of many years of the unrealistic expectation that “we must come to church perfect rather than come to church to become perfect” invading the Western Church? Christians tend to focus on behavior and Christ deals with the heart. Dealing with the heart is both time consuming and messy. Not everyone wants to wade into that mess – either for themselves or with others.
The verse you used, however, is very apropos here. Are we willing to allow God to use our life-changing circumstance to get at the life-change needed in those around us? He can use the same exact process He’s using to change our lives to get those around us to see their need to be like Christ, rather than conformity to appearing like a good Christian. It’s my hope and prayer that more believers in Jesus will take the step to be real with their God and real with other. That is why I’ve chosen to be real with my struggles with those at my church and the world through the book More Than a Sunday Faith. We all have our drugs of choice that the Spirit wants to exchange with Christ-like character. The more we all realize that we’re on a journey to be like Jesus the more we’ll be able to give each other room to be changed, even when it still hurts us.
Let’s pray for the Spirit to help us all be real with Jesus and with each other.